Face it, everyone is a little dysfunctional...

Congratulations to our "Dysfunctional Holiday Story" contest winner Deborah Barrett! Our E-Update Subscribers were asked to submit their favorite dysfunctional holiday story in anticipation of our presentation of "Second City's Dysfunctional Holiday Revue" Dec. 14. Deborah won a $25 gift card to the Alys Stephens Center. Here's the winning story...

Once upon a time several years ago, my family insisted on a buying a lovely Fraser Fir tree which was just too large and majestic.

After dear husband sawed on its trunk he decided it would do. We drug it up the steps and through the door and jammed it in its stand in the place of honor. Then he carefully strung the lights but decided it just wasn't straight enough, was still too tall, and didn't look good. To make it sufficiently straight and a bit less statuesque, he decided it needed a different stand which he brought down from the attic.

Unfortunately we didn't think the tree would well survive being pulled back outside through the door, since now the limbs had dropped appropriately to accommodate the lights. So we gently put it down on its side in the family room, lights and all, and attempted to exchange the stand. Alas, the trunk would not fit in the new stand, and thus required more sawing. By now his saw had about given out and so had he, but he would not be denied. With difficulty and after much ado, he fired up the chain saw right in the family room. This finally did the trick; however not only did we have wood chips flying all over and engine exhaust in the air, but oil leaked out of the saw in the process as well.

The tree was finally raised again and the decorations were completed, but at the time he swore he would not be getting another live tree. Fortunately, that proved not to be the case in subsequent, less traumatic years.

Hope you got a chuckle out of this story that's too ridiculous not to be true...

Deborah Barrett